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So sick of Love Songs - so tired of tears

I am emotionally empty right now - and otherwise,too. Seemed so fitting that I start to vomit yesterday night, losing 4 kilos through that alone.I will go to the doc today but I guess it still won´t help.I think it is rather than a virus, something emotional. I am only guessing what it could be, since I should be so damn happy. The guy I have this huge crush on likes me enough to come to my birthday party and fuck - thats more than enough. I am a little low on self esteem sometimes - especially concerning dating and so on.

But yesterday - it hurt my heart so much and yet it was good, wonderful evening in Oberhausen. Until the vomitting came in.Oh well.I know I can live and eat on that gazes and those hugs for a little longer.

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